So there it is, his possibility for a reconcilation, put out there, did I think he meant it, or was he running scared, he had gone over there full of the promises of life, and found the same thing over there a woman with questions, especially since I had texted whore and put  the picture about the relationship he had with his wife, no loveless, sexless marraige, a real live voice full of tears at the end of the phone is a bit harder to discount than whatever bullshit he had fed whore that she was willing to believe, in regards to that although  I think that she knew exactly what type of life he had here, she just wanted him anyway,(bitch).

Anyway, I really didnt think that I would ever be able to forgive him, but I just kept the I dont know line up, because I didnt really know, but I doubted it. a week of how are you, and is everything ok with you went by, and then it was mortgage week and his pocket felt the pinch. 

The poor me texts started again, Im lonely, Im sad, I cannot live like this, I have no money, I wont be able to pay all the mortgage, Im so unhappy. Now dont get confused  this these texts came from him to me, not the other way round,
the misery was increasing for him and the grass started to shine greener from the foreign lands again.

So I texted her, what he had told me, said I hadnt decided what to do yet, told her again what she had done and the pain she had caused, it was a bit difficult to do this, I didnt know that you could block mobile numbers from a network, or that you could block individual phone numbers from sending you a message, nothing from o2 would deliver and the calls wouldnt go in, so I hunted down an vodafone phone and it delivered. Good!!

He was not a happy bunny about that one, said no one could influnce his decision but him, and did I get it, and when I would I cop on, this couldnt go on much longer he couldnt go on much longer he couldnt live like this, so what did the nasty in me say, in the most sincere voice possible, sometimes I still cant believe I said it to him "Well die then".

Okay I accept that was an awful thing to say, but to me what had happened was worse than him dying on me, at least then I would have lamented him, told the world I had lost my one true love, and paid the mortgage with the life assurance policy, and you know what they say hell hath no fury, and at that moment and time I was furious......